On January 27, 2023, our surprise last baby, Jack Immel, was born painfully silent and had already gone somewhere far less scary than this world with his oldest brother, Isaac. He was gone before we even got to the hospital, much like his brother had been. He was perfect in every way, and our hearts will have yet another hole in them for the rest of our days.

This experience feels so similar to losing our firstborn, Isaac, in 2016. Yet it couldn’t be more different. We have Max, Asher, and Caleb to stay strong for. I almost died, had emergency surgery, and spent time on a ventilator this time. There is a lot to share, and I’m glad I still have this platform to share our experience. I hope, somehow, this can help others know that they are not alone and that no feelings are wrong. I hope this helps Isaac and Jack matter in their own way.

We are so grateful for the outpouring of love and support that we have received during this difficult time. Thank you so much to those who have reached out, contributed to the meal train, or kept our family in your thoughts. We appreciate your support more than you can know.

Now we heal. We’re starting this process all over again six and a half years later. I don’t know what it will look like, but I guess that’s just life.